Wednesday, February 5, 2014

*Reflections: Like A Cloudy Day...Dancing In The Rain!

The past few days, since last Friday have been like a cloudy day...with a blue sky peeking through the background...right now it is cloudy outside and since that captured how these past few days have been for me I decided to go with that for the title of this post.  So lately, it's been challenging...Life in general...some days are soo beautiful like the blue sky days and others have been way to challenging.

For those of you who happen to just find my blog...I am fostering to adopt a little girl who happens to also be my relative (third cousin) and I have discovered just this year not too long ago of how that in itself will be an ongoing challenge.  I have decided to start a new blog for that and so I will post a link for it when I get it all set up.  Especially since I'd like this blog to be focused more on my artwork and creative processes and a little personal reflecting here and there. :)

So why else would I say "like a cloudy day"?  Well, I feel like I've been learning a lot and lessons are hard to learn...sometimes they make you feel depressed (gloomy grey clouds), heartbroken (rain of tears), and then also so happy when I've experienced breakthroughs (like sunshine bursting through the clouds) and even though I experience all these emotions I know my Lord is with me always, guiding me through and that brings me peace (like the blue skies).

But sometimes I get so overwhelmed especially when all those lessons come all at once and the only way for me to push forward is when I 'blog' about it...don't know why...but it does!  I do art journal but it's a different type of therapy for I am a strong believer in the healing that art therapy can provide as a way to 'express' yourself.  But since I am also a writer...I guess sometimes I need to just get my thoughts out there...blogging helps me to do this but in a more focused and optimistic manner.

When I journal for myself I tend to focus more on the negative and when I read through that it leaves an ugly feeling in my stomach...but whenever I blog I tend to focus on the positive and then when I reread these posts they actually make me feel better since I can see where I've struggled but feel good knowing how I've overcome those times.

Without all the details since it is way to personal...I experienced the most vast array of emotions all in one night...Saturday...I had a night mainly full of fun and laughter and reconnected with so many people that I treasure the most...but also along with that I experienced heartache and betrayal...which led to an unhappy ending of what was a wonderful evening...if that is at all possible...of course, I would be the one to have that I know that the Lord knows I can handle it!

The next day was a day of mixed emotions and revelations...I accepted some of the ugly as I can not do anything about some of it and the most important of all I dealt with and was satisfied with the outcome of it.  Love in itself is powerful and I learned that night that sometimes we have to accept some things and show that the Love in our heart is strong and can prevail.

I am moving on...I am looking forward...I am not going to let myself stay fallen on the ground...I have stood back on my feet and I will keep dancing in the rain!!

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